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Hello, everyone. This is Lisa Wilson with the Aspen Center for Empowerment and Healing. Thank you so much for being here today.
In today's conversation, I want to talk about that wounded self and how those wounds are created—I should say, one aspect of how those wounds are created. Once again, it's a topic that has so many moving parts to it, but let's just shine a light in one area right now.
Let's look at what happens to the soul that creates a fragmented self. Because when we do this healing work and when we take our power back out of toxic relationships and walk away from experiences with narcissistic personality disorder, it's a benefit to you to understand one way that I know of how these wounds can be created.
If we were in a big warehouse and there were all these different compartments in the warehouse, those separated or fragmented parts of ourselves go into a box that gets stored in this warehouse. And the light is no longer shining on it, and it's a separation from the self.
I'll just share a little story, and we'll go from there. My first husband was killed in a car accident when I was 24 or 25 years old. And I remember somebody saying to me, “How did you get through that?”
I use that as a story to share with you to make sure you're clear that when I bring something to the table and we dive into it, it's because I've lived through it. I've lived through a lot of life and a lot of experiences, and I am very clear, without a shadow of a doubt, of what this journey was for me.
One of the things that I got to witness in myself is how we are able to take something so painful, that it's as though a part of ourselves gets separated.
A person, whom I do some work with, brought it to my attention (which I loved and made sense to me) that if we were in a big warehouse and there were all these different compartments in the warehouse, those separated or fragmented parts of ourselves go into a box that gets stored in this warehouse. And the light is no longer shining on it, and it's a separation from the self.
In turn, that creates a wound. And in that wound, there's a vibrational frequency that we emanate out. And that's what we call to us in our outer life experiences. We bring in these relationships or life experiences that call in these fragmented parts of ourselves.
I've been doing shamanic healing work for as long as I can remember. Through this journey of awakening that I have been on since I was 20 years old and going through some pretty significant life transitions, I have witnessed myself going into finding these parts of myself without really understanding that it was what I was doing. Until I got clearer and I was able to ask some more questions around it and then dive deeper. But in the beginning, I was just on this mission to find these fragmented parts of myself.
I share that because it's a part of what we will do. We will constantly be drawing to us, without us being aware of it, at a subconscious level, experiences that will help us illuminate the wound within us, so we could call in these hidden aspects that are missing from ourselves. This is how they get separated or one way they get separated.
Another thing that happened as I started diving into studying shamanic work and doing energy healing work, what I realized and what I was taught is that the soul can separate or fragment itself through something mild. For instance, a baby is sleeping, and something drops and startles that baby awake. That could create a fragmented aspect of that child.
We will constantly be drawing to us, without us being aware of it, at a subconscious level, experiences that will help us illuminate the wound within us, so we could call in these hidden aspects that are missing from ourselves.
It's almost like a mechanism that is built in so that we can handle trauma in life. But ultimately, you will have to do the work to call in those parts of you back home in order to bring in the fullness of you.
There are many different ways that we call these experiences to us. Some people will do it through addictions and going down that path. Some people do it through a healing crisis.
In my experience, I was born into a family with narcissistic personality disorder, and I've had many experiences with this behavior pattern that has ultimately called me to wake up and discover those fragmented aspects of me and bring them back home. Then there's a process of integrating those parts of yourself back into you.
So I wanted to share a little bit about that journey so that you're clear on how parts of ourselves can get fragmented. It doesn't have to be a big trauma that took place that created a fragmented self. It could be, like I said, a baby sleeping who was startled awake. Or a child is in the grocery store and the mother is nowhere to be seen, and for that moment, the child can't find its mama. There, a schism and a fragmented aspect of self can be created.
There are so many different ways that the soul protects itself. It doesn't have to be a big impact.
Now, every person is different, and we all handle life experiences differently. I happen to be an extremely sensitive person, highly empathic. So it doesn't take much for me to go without awareness. (Let me just say it that way.)
Now, I'm inoculated from a lot of external life experiences because I've lived through a lot of it. Now, I've called in those fragmented parts of myself and continue to do so. And as I do, I experience less trauma when it comes to small things that used to create a big trauma for me, those that created that schism and that separation.
But we're amazing beings—we really are. I just want to say that energy healing work is a really significant way to do the healing work around these life experiences that change and transform you at your core.
Then what happens? How do we raise our vibrational frequency after we've brought in these hidden, fragmented parts of ourselves back home?
Well, I'll use the story of the cork that's being held underwater. When a cork is being held underwater, it's just under there. But when you take your hands off, naturally, the cork will rise to the surface. Well, that's our vibrational frequency.
How do we know we have unhealed hidden aspects? Well, you can look at them in the mirror of your external life. Everything we see or live through in our external life is just a reflection of an internal aspect of ourselves.
As we call in these parts of ourselves back home, we integrate them, and we do the work around really shining a light into our own shadow and self-love. Our vibrational frequency, similar to that cork, will naturally rise to the point that is a natural balance for you. It does it without you doing a thing. It’s just what happens.
Our work, the work that our human body is here to do, is to really call in those parts of ourselves to do the healing work around those unhealed hidden aspects.
How do we know we have unhealed hidden aspects? Well, you can look at them in the mirror of your external life. Everything we see or live through in our external life is just a reflection of an internal aspect of ourselves. So if your life is flowing and bringing you wonderful, joyful life experiences, that is what is going on inside you.
Also, let me just say that we live in a world of duality, so sometimes you're going to get a cold. There's not going to be a bigger meaning to the cold—it’s just going to be a cold. Sometimes you'll have an experience that is not the most joyful, and yet it's just part of life’s duality.
But when you're in a repetitive cycle, constantly having things just knock you off your platform and rock your world a little, then it's time to really take a deeper look because there's a repetitive pattern that's trying to wake you up.
Or if there's any type of behavior that you're having a challenge with within you—alcohol drug addiction is one. If we constantly have certain health crisis showing up in our lives. If our relationships are constantly toxic and depleting. These are just certain ways that we call life experiences to us to really dive in deep to look within. Where, within, do we need to shore up our own energy? Where is there a wound?
The human ego is amazing at negotiating and filling in those fragmented self with the ego, protecting your heart, putting up walls that keep you separated from your own shadow. That's why we bring in these experiences to help shine a light.
When you're in a repetitive cycle, constantly having things just knock you off your platform and rock your world a little, then it's time to really take a deeper look because there's a repetitive pattern that's trying to wake you up.
So I will always say the narcissist is your greatest gift. I talk about narcissistic personality disorder and toxic relationships because that has been the theme of my life path. However, I've witnessed the healing journey take place through different kinds of vehicles. We just bring it in in whatever way we need to wake us up.
Thank you so much for being here. We'll continue this conversation as we go along. I'm just grateful—grateful to be doing this work, grateful for all the life experiences I've had, and grateful for the awareness, clarity, and understanding around it, so that I can be that person to have this deep conversation with you.
Thank you so much. Look forward to more. Please like, subscribe, and share. Bye for now.